Period of Uncertainty

Run.. Run... An escape from depression is really great... It's just what I need... This is when I turn to my friends.. However, one silly mistake that I've done, changed everything.

Perhaps it seems ordinary, it in fact affected the person, who decided to retaliate, and wants to beat me in my own game. But this has changed things, I know none of us is actually guilty, but none of us is innocent. This left our relationship or perhaps you all prefer, friendship, shaky and unstable. At anytime a gush of wind could just break the line....

What a fool I am, to think that people should feel pity and give way for me.. I'm a bit self-centered after that tragic incident.. My desperate escape from depression, anger, and unsatisfaction has lead me to a plunge to the Land of Uncertainty...

I couldn't have a friend that will be nice, and suddenly bad to me... It will just make me keep thinking about things.. And perhaps make me regret of my actions. Friends are my important assets... I really do treasure them. A wind of change came and changed everything. I'm always the one lending a hand, shoulder to anyone that needs it, always to comfort, support and encourage people... Now it seems I'm the one that needs it..

Then again, my emotions now had aligned with that relationship, friendship of mine... One will affect the other... Both is linked together now... I do hope all this never did happened... But what's done is done, what follows is inevitable...

All I can do now is hope for the best and work towards the future... Somehow if I laugh or joke with people, it's just temporary... Not long after I'll be haunted by the feeling again. A feeling that I can't describe... It has bitter, sour taste altogether.. A chef's experiment disaster.. A total jumble up of mixed feelings served on a dish. It has the taste of regret, sadness, disappointment, sorrow topped with a sauce of anger and sprinkles of hope...

I hope things will get better... All I can do for my friends out there, is to be strong, dependent and unaffected... I might be numb and dull abit sometimes... But I'm sure that my Lord will somehow manage to restore hope and give me strength to move on... Perhaps He can turn the tides... Until then, all the best!! =)